1. Blaming your gas on me…. Not Funny
2. Yelling at me for barking. I am a dog you idiot.
3. Taking me for a walk then not letting me check stuff out.
Exactly whose walk is this anyway?
4. Any trick balancing food on my nose…. Stop it.
5. Yelling at me for rubbing myself on your carpet. Why did
you buy carpet?
6. Getting upset when I sniff crotches of your guests. Sorry
but I haven't quite mastered the handshake thing yet…idiot
7. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why
we chew your stuff up when you are not home.
8. Taking me to the vet for "The big snip", then acting surprised
when I freak out everytime we go back.
9. Dog Sweaters
10. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throws. You fooled a dog! What
a proud moment for the top of the food chain you nitwit.