I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird
religious cult."
-- Rita Rudner

"My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can.
That's almost $7.00 in dog money."
-- Joe Weinstein

"Some days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant."
-- Unknown

"If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs
I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons."
-- James Thurber

"You enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person
with pets."
-- Nora Ephron

"Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you
are wonderful."
-- Ann Landers

"Women and cats will do as they please and men and dogs should relax
and get used to the idea."
-- Robert A. Heinlein

"In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone
should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him."
-- Dereke Bruce

"There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face."
-- Ben Williams

"When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem."
-- Edward Abbey

"Cat's Motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it
look like the dog did it."
-- Unknown