- rough condition... too bad to lie about

- parts car... beyond repair

- immaculate... recently washed

- engine quiet... if you use 90-weight oil

- needs minor overhaul... needs engine

- needs major overhaul... Phone the junkyard

- burns no oil... (it all leaks out)

- rebuilt engine... Cleaned the spark plugs.

- Drive it away... I live on a hill.

- Drive it anywhere... (within 10 miles)

- desirable classic... No one wants it.

- rare classic... No one wanted it even when it was new.

- stored 20 years... (in a farmer's field)

10. Your tinted windows are also known as Hefty Garbage
Bags.

9. The car reaches its optimum speed when going downhill.

8. The hi-tech stereo system often requires a new needle.

7. The rear-view mirror says, "Objects in Mirror Are Better
Than This Piece of Junk."

6. The odometer on the dashboard is not as sophisticated as
the everyday abacus.

5. Traffic Watch warns other drivers what highway you're
taking.

4. The sticker on the windshield says, "Batteries Not
Included."

3. You fill up the tank with Unleaded Coals.